![]() Image: So how can I help myself orgasm?įirstly, forget the study, Child says, and do what feels good for you. Making an orgasm the goal of sex can also be your downfall. ![]() “It’s pretty crazy that as women we put this pressure on ourselves to be able to please a man in a certain way and be able to make him come in a certain timeframe when many guys just don’t really care about doing the same for a woman or just have no idea how to,” she says. Tanya adds that this pressure is especially unfair when “our sexual organs are completely different to a man’s”. “And that’s so much more important than choosing some magical position.” “It robs you of being able to stay present and in the moment and enjoy the journey, not just the destination” Child says. She also says that making an orgasm the goal of sex can also be your downfall. “Women put a lot of pressure on themselves, and I have to say that one of the biggest blockers to being able to orgasm is putting more pressure on yourself. “But it’s important to know that it’s very common.” “A lot of people who come to me haven’t talked openly about it before and so feel pretty isolated and pretty broken, like they’re not normal, and have a lot of shame,” Child explains. ![]() Miserably it's this pressure of not being able to climax while doing it that creates even greater pressure and makes women even less likely to reach orgasm. I have to be really focused on it and I can’t do that mid-sex.” The pressure cycle “It’s just such a mission for me to reach orgasm, like it’s definitely a mental thing and I have to be in the right mindset to actually get there. “I definitely need a lot of clitoral stimulation to feel even close, but I just can’t do it through sex alone. ![]() She adds that changing positions during sex doesn’t make any difference. One-third of women surveyed never climax during intercourse. “Usually we have sex, he will finish and then I will use my vibrator to make myself come,” she explains. “I can sometimes get there if I’m helping myself but I can’t remember the last time someone else made me come.” Tanya, 33, has been married for the last eight years and tells Body+Soul that she’s never been able to orgasm through sex. The study reveals that one-third of women surveyed never climax during intercourse, no matter which position they’re in. Unfortunately, not everyone is in the same boat. It works nearly every single time.” The mental mind game “While I’m riding him, everything just feels like it’s being stimulated all at once and I’m the one in control, meaning I can move how it feels good for me. “I love sex and trying out loads of positions because they do all feel really great, but I just can’t get there unless I’m on top,” she explains to Body+Soul. It also leaves both partners hands-free, meaning you’re available to touch each other wherever you desire, or even bring some toys into the mix.įor 34-year-old Leah, it’s the only position she can climax in. ![]() Not only does this position allow women to control everything – such as speed, depth of insertion and rhythm – but through hip movements they can rub their pelvis against a man’s pubic bone, stimulating their clitoris. This brings us to the best move of all, the study proclaims, and that’s the woman on top. When it comes to sex positions, simple is best. ![]()
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